| A
female
age
41-50,
anonymous
writes: Hi: I need emotional help with this matter. I know this is not the biggest deal in the world but I need someone to talk to. I've been unemployed for 10 months now. I had to quit my last job because of: disrespectful boss, bitter/depressing environment, dead-end position and almost working for free. I've been trying to make it as a sales person paid only by commision but that's first of all not working for me. And second of all is not what I want because I recently graduated from a Master's degree in Industrial Psychology and I want to find a job related to it. So far I have had no luck. I got tired and decided to take this course to get a Human Resources certifcation to see if that combined with my master's would help me to land a job on that field because I used to work at Human Resources but only lasted six months and no company cares about that experience. The thing is that when I started this course (charging it to my very indebted credit card)I felt very good about myself because I live with my parents at thirtysomething and was loosing my self esteem for being unemployed for such a long time. I was happy until the course (wich will last until the end of the year) required teamwork. There I started comparing myself to others. Almost everyone there has a job and a lot of them are there because their company is paying the course for them. Also I live two hours away wich makes it like a double sacrifice for me. Everyone gather two days before to the final presentation but me. I had to tell them the truth. That I was kind of broke and every trip I made from my home to reunite with them was costing me a lot and that I couldn't afford it. They were cool about it. I made my part of the final presentation for the course and maybe more. We maintained communication through email and everythign was going OK. Until I learned that the day of the presentation came and I dind't show up. I would've sworn I was sure there were no classes that day. But I was mistaken. I was sending all these emails to everybody telling them about what I have done for the final presentation and it turns out I made a fool out of myself because that was the day I was supposed to be there and instead stayed home. Now I feel worst than I did before. Someone told me I have to take the class again. I feel so ashamed I don't want to tell this to my family or friends because I already feel I've failed in so many areas. I have student loans to pay, credit cards debts I'm paying each month by withdrawing money from the other credit cards, I'm not getting any younger, etc. I can't believe this I feel like I failed to myself because this in almost the only commitment I have and still I fail. Every day for me is like a battle, I might laugh outside but inside I'm crying and filled with insecurities that only feed themselves as time goes by and my situation worsens by the lack of money and the growth of my debts. Reply to this Question
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male
reader, anonymous, writes (5 August 2007): tommorow is another day, you still have your health and suportive parents, when you think back in years to come it will seem nothing , hang in there . john
A
female
reader, drbroz  +, writes (2 May 2007):
 You are at a very low point in your life and you don't need me to tell you that. What I want to tell you is that this may indeed be the lowest point in your life. I hope that it is. It was a mistake to quit your former job without having another job lined up or at least being out of debt.
Everybody makes mistakes.
The good news is you haven't made any of the really bad ones. You haven't broken laws, made unwanted babies, or ruined your health. There don't you feel better?
Just kidding. But really, so you made some errors with debts and school scheduling.
Debts may have to be handled with debt counseling which frankly may even involve bankruptcy. That is the rock bottom bad news. Everything else can only go up. You are young, you have supportive parents, and are obviously intelligent. Take advantage of free services your school offers for help with your finances and your emotional problems. That includes their counseling center and finding someone (maybe an economics professor) to help you with your finances. It never hurts to ask. Keep asking....
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A
male
reader, maverick  +, writes (29 April 2007):
 It's ok. You will bounce back. I notice a few weeks have passed so could you please give an update on how things are going?
Your family will not likely thrash you for failing. You should be able to turn to then for support. Do talk to them and let them lend their support.
Do not be disheartened by not having a job for 10 months. It took me about that time to get my job. Be persistant and don't be dependant on recruitment agencies to find you that job. For now you could try temping via na agency. Send your CV and a covering letter to various companies areound your are explaining why you would be good in a particular role. I notice you have a degre in Psychology? Thats awesome - it's my favourite subject. Considered working for charities or places of personal support? Even volunteer for now to keep you going. Try volunteering work and sorts. Develop a routine too.
The HR and Psychology qualification could work well together. Don't be concerned about how the other students view you - they have their own concerns to deal with. They are not interested in you status. Do you want to take the class again? If not then cut it loose and move on.
Money problems are a big worry for many other people. Please try your nearest Citizen's Advice Bureau (if you are UK). The will be able to point you personal financial advisors who can assist. For bits of financial advice try
www.moneysavingexpert.com
If you need to discuss more please message again or you could talk to someone at www.samaritans.org.uk
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