A
female
age
22-25,
anonymous
writes:HiI have been in my present job for 2 years, i work in the care industry, not in a hospital but in the community. Recently i had to wait for a colleague to turn up, which she did after 50mins and my three calls to the main office. She never apologised for being late and i wish i had reprimanded her, even the lady we were there to see said i should say something, but i just couldnt. Now i feel i have let myself down and even my client. I was wondering how i could improve my self-confidence because i was very angry at being held up, while i had other calls to make. I am not in a position to reprimand this fellow colleague, but in the circumstance i feel i should have done much better.Also i remember the woman from my secondary school and while she was in the year below, i remember her being a bully. Perhaps this also weighed on my mind.How can i stop this from happening again? Reply to this Question |
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male
reader, maverick +, writes (29 April 2007):
 Hello, I appreciate this is a late response but hopefully it may still be of some use to someone. You shave a few options available to you. Tell her off properly, handle it yourself or do nothing.
Firstly it can be a difficult to tell someone off for something they've done wrong - especially if they are a peer. Even if you are particularly confident. First you need to know what you grievances/disciplinary procedure is for your work place.
This should tell you what you should do if you are unhappy. In most places this means making a formal complaint with your boss. Typically you will have to put this in writting and refer to any other persons involved.
Your colleague will then be approached to asked to comment. Initially you may want to say you are concerned of possible reprisals inluding aggressive and abusive behaiviour, when you raise the complaint.
Also you may wish to contact (or join then contact) a relevant union. This will ensure your company handles the issue properly without it being swept under the rug.
It is a sad fact that many companies I have come across are not very good at dealing with diciplinary problems. Usually issuing informal warnings and allow reprisals to run on. If you are not happy, go to the next boss to complain, then the next boss to complain. Failing that - you could always leave and sue the company (they will take you very seriously at that point).
Second you could choose to handle these situations yourself. This will likely result in a confrontation between you two. Not knowing your personalities I do not know if that would be a good or bad idea.
And finally, you could do nothing. This situation could keep reocurring.
Sorry it doesn't look to great does it. On seperat note, there are things you can do to build up confidence. Buy books on Neuro-Linguistic Programming, Self-Confidence and Body Language - they will help you develop. I recommend Paul McKenna's Instant Confidence.
Please take care. M
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