Can a guy just be shy or is he avoiding being questioned?
Q. What does it mean when a guy doesn't answer a question? - I really like this guy who stays in touch by phone with me as we live apart! - The thing is - he rarely shows any emotion and sometimes when I ask him something outright he just doesn't ...
A. 18 November 2008: Your question is too vague to answer as you don't even mention the question, but even if this guy is shy, it doesn't mean that he would rarely show any emotion or would seemingly ignore you if you spoke to him.
Maybe you could ask him if he is... (read in full...)
I don't get how he's gone totally different it's like he's had a personality change!
Q. I would never dream of cheating on my boyfriend! We've been together for a long time! At the start of the relationship things were PERFECT and I'm really not kidding, he was the most amazing boyfriend I could ever dream of but just within 7 months, ...
A. 18 November 2008:
I don't know if your boyfriend is showing "normal" levels of insecurity or he has real issues with you talking to other guys, but if it is the former then I suggest you sit your boyfriend down and tell him that you used to see him as the most perf... (read in full...)
I am tempted to befriend this creepy person again, but only to get int ouch with his friends, any advice?
Q. Okay, I had this friend a couple of years ago who I used to hang out with. We originally went to school together, and years later bumped into each other in a gay club (I'm not open about my sexuality to any of my friends). I then broke down, sobbing ...
A. 14 November 2008: I agree, it sounds like it could involve a lot of drama if you let him back in to your life, and if he is as strange as you describe him then I doubt his friends can really be that great?... (read in full...)
I like goth clothing, is goth believing in the devil?
Q. Hey, I'm a christian. I like goth clothing. Just the way they look, dress. Can I dress goth? Is goth believing in the devil. I want to know more about goth. Any advice?...
A. 13 November 2008: Goth culture (which is heavily influenced by music) and satanism (which is a religious belief) are not related at all.
I don't know about SA Goth, but British Goth culture originally came from the punk and rock genre of music, and nowadays... (read in full...)
Need Validation Please
Q. I've been more alone than this - but never so lonely. I have absolutely nobody to talk to about this problem. When I was 15 I was infatuated with my best friend's older brother. If you were to read my diary it still has entries of only him. I was cr...
A. 12 November 2008: Hey, it sounds like you have had a lot of heartache with this guy and like you say it has left you with a lot of pieces to pick up. I think any one in your situation would feel as in pain and hurt as you do now, I know I have felt so low and ... (read in full...)
Whose surname should my new baby have?
Q. Heya everyone =) Ok, well I've just had a beautiful baby boy, we got home from the hospital yesterday. I'm finding things hard but he is definitely worth it... I love him so much. Me and the father are no longer together (His choice, not mine...
A. 12 November 2008:
If the fathers name is going to be on the babies birth certificate then he automatically has legal rights including being part in agreeing the babies surname.
This is a bit of a legal mine-field. If you are adamant that you don't want his sur... (read in full...)
Is it common to feel discouraged that you'll never find the one?
Q. Is it common to feel discouraged that you'll never find the one? I finishing my seventh year of university studies this year and I expect my dating prospects to plummet once I'm working full-time meeting the same pool of office workers on a dai...
A. 12 November 2008:
Personally I would say unless you keep your social life up the same as it was at university, and continue going out to places where there are single people, then dating prospects do drop. You definitely have to make more of an effort if you want... (read in full...)
I check my ex's facebook page several times a day. How do I stop?
Q. I check my ex's facebook page several times a day. How do I stop? Removing her as a friend would be unbelievably insulting and is not an option. I've stopped using facebook for a couple of weeks and then came back as it's not possible to simp...
A. 12 November 2008:
The only option is to remove her as a friend, it's the only way to stop temptation.
I don't think she would find it insulting if you sent her a message to explain why you are doing it. I'm sure most people have been in your situation an... (read in full...)
How can I remove my stretch marks?
Q. right im a lil embarassed about this but here goes. i am a lil over weight tbh and i have stretch marks and im a male. i wont go swimming because of this or take my top off cos i am scared of what others will think. my last girlfriend thought i was ...
A. 12 November 2008:
A lot of people recommend "bio-oil" for stretch marks, but the truth is that there is practically nothing you can do to get rid of them.
They do fade over time, and also if you can slim down any excess fat, tone up your body and keep the sam... (read in full...)
I stole money and now I feel so guilty!
Q. hey, i just wanted to confess to something i did 4 years ago that haunts me, and i'm terrified one day it will come back on me, but its unlikely, but i dont know what to do. i'm a good person and i do a lot for others, i teach kids, i do work ...
A. 11 November 2008:
Posting your guilt on a website isn't going to change anything. The right thing to do is to earn the $200 + interest and pay it back as soon as you can. ... (read in full...)
I can't get over him and feel miserable most of the time, what can I do to feel better?!?
Q. It has been eight weeks since we ended a two year relationship. I have done everything I know to get better. I have ok days but there are still days that I feel so sad and miss him so much. He has moved on with someone else. Everyone keeps telling ...
A. 11 November 2008: Hey. I disagree with your friends, I don't think you should necessarily be over it. In fact, I think 8 weeks is not long for someone you spent 2 years of your life with. It shows you loved him and there is nothing wrong with that. He is also with ... (read in full...)
He sent his gal pal a picture of his penis!
Q. ok so me and my boyfriend have been together right at a year and been living together for 6 months. He's 26 I'm 22.. I've dated way more guys than he has girls. He's been in 3 serious relationships his whole life me being one of them and the one ...
A. 11 November 2008: Your boyfriend cried because he got caught, not because he regrets sending the picture. Then he insults your intelligence by saying it was to cheer her up - excuses, excuses.
Don't be blinded by love - there is obviously something more going on... (read in full...)
Why are all men selfish, disrespectful, ignorant bastards??!
Q. Why are all men selfish, disrespectful, ignorant bastards??! Theyre so nice when they want sumthing then they discard you like a piece of rubbish. They can be the best boyfriend ever but wont think twice about dumping you for another woman and ...
A. 29 October 2008:
Hey, there is obviously a lot of pain and heartache in you right now, but if you take a step back and re-read what you have written it is a lot more telling of the kind of guys you have fallen for, rather than a problem with men in themselves. The... (read in full...)
Are some men turned off by a womans career path?
Q. Are some men turned off by a woman's career path? Im in my early 30's and finishing up a cardiothoracic surgery fellowship and hoping to start my own independant pracitce next year. I have dated many guys in the past but none of them have reached ...
A. 28 October 2008: These are just general thoughts, not aimed at you specifically, but personally I find women who are very driven and successful in a career have tended to learn at some point that femininity is a weakness, and suppress it to achieve more in their ... (read in full...)
I am so insecure about "down there" after he asked me this!
Q. Sorry if this is graphic but I have always been a little uncomfortable with myself in that area but now I am so self consious about sex!! My "lips" are large, especially the right side and they are a darkish color, like gray/purplish. My now ex ...
A. 20 October 2008: I agree with Uncle Phil. Larger labia's are a little more unusual but they are certainly not rare or anything to be ashamed about. Wanting to get surgery for that is like a woman who is 6 foot tall wanting to have the bones on her legs cut down to... (read in full...)
Feeling super lonely after finishing my master's, where can I find people with similar interests? I'm too old for the youth clubs!
Q. I've been feeling super lonely since I finished my masters. This problem is compounded by the fact that two of my close friends have left the country for good plus I find it very hard to meet girls (who are relationship worthy). Other friends have ...
A. 18 October 2008:
It can be quite a shock when you come out of education, I still find it a bit weird since I graduated a couple of years ago.
You definitely sound down about your current life situation, and it sounds like you really need to shake your life up... (read in full...)
I am scared of sex!!!!!
Q. I am actually 13 and one of my friends has been having sex (or so she says she does) and I was thinking maybe I should but I'm scared and my parents are overprotective -- not toooo much but I want to, now will I be a virgin forever if I'm scared to ...
A. 18 October 2008: You are totally and completely normal to be scared to have sex at your age. There are plenty of people in their late teens or early 20s who are still virgins and are scared to have sex. It is a sign that you are not ready yet.
Try and think re... (read in full...)
I can't get my boyfriend turned on... Guys opinions wanted!
Q. My boyfriend just doesn't get turned on! He won't get hard EVER. I do so many things. I spent over $100 on two little outfits to make him happy cuz he said he liked those but it didn't work very well. It's so frustrating and I don't know what to do. ...
A. 18 October 2008:
Does he have any medical condition that is causing this?
Or is it because he just isn't in to you in that way?
If he doesn't fancy you then no amount of sexy outfits will change his mind. Maybe he really likes you in many ways, but he ju... (read in full...)
Underage sex with someone who is under aged too and I could be pregnant. Please HELP!!!
Q. My next door neighbor is 14 years old and he and I have been dating for about 6 months. He used to just finger me but, a month ago I lost my virginity to him. We have sex early everyday cos both our parents aren't home when we get home from school, ...
A. 18 October 2008: Hey
Although it might seem now like you just want to die and are totally screwed, I can assure you that you will work this out and things will get better.
But before that happens, I think the first thing you need to do is take responsibility o... (read in full...)
I had unprotected sex. Am I pregnant?
Q. I'm 14 and me and my boyfriend had sex without a condem and I think that i'm preagnet but i'm not sure. I haven't started my period in I don't know how long and I have all of the symptoms of being preagnet. Am i preagnet?...
A. 15 October 2008: It sounds like you could be pregnant, but the first thing I recommend you do is tell someone that you trust and you know will be supportive by what you say. This may be a best friend, an adult, supervisor, a parent, or even by finding a support ... (read in full...)
Question for the guys - does a guy like to pursue or be pursued?
Q. I have been reading some of the posts where in a girl makes the first move on a guy and the guy didn't reciprocate. Can guys pls pitch in as to whether they like to pursue or be pursued?I am sure it will help a lot of the single gals over here....
A. 7 October 2008: Personally I've always found it very flattering when girls approach me and I would say to any girls that like a guy to go for it that's what they want to do.
But I do think after the initial approach and them having said something, it is then up ... (read in full...)
Rape victims afraid - I am one but I am not frightened.
Q. At 14 years old I was a rebel a girl who thought she could handle herself, go out drinking, sleep with men and do as she wished. I learnt the hard way, as I journied home I was pulled into an alley and brutally beaten and raped by 2 grown men. They ...
A. 5 October 2008:
Hopefully at the very least your article will stop one person from putting themselves in a situation where they will end up being raped. I have known far too many teen girls and friends who were raped whilst they were drinking or partying. Whil... (read in full...)
Are there any good old guys still out there? Where do I go to find him?
Q. After I got divorced I started to date. Seems that I am horrible at choosing a good,honest guy to date. So far the few Ive dated want only a casual thing and they are way selfish in bed and two minutes and they are done and thats it no ...
A. 30 September 2008: Hey, I am sure there are just as many "good" guys around your age as there are good women around your age. You never know what circumstances happen in peoples lives to cause them to become single in their 40's or 50's. I'm sure there are just as ... (read in full...)
Can steroids be the cause of me not getting a hard-on?
Q. Hi, I need litle bit advice. i cant get a hard on now. i use to be perfectly fine but then i was on steroids for a while for body building. since i have come off them i dont seem to get a hard on, i think its because of the steroids but i d...
A. 26 September 2008: It sounds like you could be suffering from erectile dysfunction, possibly from high blood pressure. Steroids when not used properly can damage your body quite badly.
Were you cycling the use of them as you should have done if you were using th... (read in full...)
Is it legal to do sex between an unmarried couple in a hotel room?
Q. I want to do sexual intercourse with my girlfriend in a hotel. Is it legal to do sex between an unmarried couple in a hotel room? May I arrested by the police?...
A. 25 September 2008: LazyGuy, he wanted to know if there was anything illegal about having sex outside of marriage, and I researched and found out his answer.
It is not illegal to have sex outside of marriage in India and he, nor I, mentioned the religious or moral qu... (read in full...)
Has porn really become so prevalent that it has shaped the sexuality of people today?
Q. Are all young men fascinated by porn? After 20 years of marriage to my first and only sex partner, I got divorced and decided to live a little and see much younger men. In the bedroom, they all seem to want to live out their porn fantasies. They...
A. 25 September 2008: "Has porn really become so prevalent that it has shaped the sexuality of people today?" I would have to say yes to this, without a doubt. The Internet has allowed boys who are only just entering puberty, often at their most vulnerable age, ... (read in full...)
Is it legal to do sex between an unmarried couple in a hotel room?
Q. I want to do sexual intercourse with my girlfriend in a hotel. Is it legal to do sex between an unmarried couple in a hotel room? May I arrested by the police?...
A. 25 September 2008: As long as she is over 18, you don't pay her, and she isn't already married then you are not doing anything legally wrong.... (read in full...)
I found flirtacious texts on his phone, he said he did it because we were on a break at that time, I understand that but can't get the texts out of my head!
Q. Me and my boyfriend have been together for about 1yr 7 months.Last night i went through his phone i know this was wrong but... i found texts he sent about 3 months ago to this girl saying "i enjoyed our sexy kiss last night etc.... I got really ...
A. 25 September 2008: The problem about going on a break is that sometimes the two people can react very differently, like in your case this guy has looked elsewhere for some attention, whereas I assume the last thing on your mind was getting with someone else and I ... (read in full...)
I'm keeping a major secret from the guy that could be my childs father, is that wrong?
Q. Ok, so i know you are gonna think i am a slut but please dont judge me. I don't sleep around and before i got myself in this mess i hadn't slept with anyone for over 8 months. So I knew this guy at we had been friends for ages but we live in diff...
A. 22 September 2008:
I think you should think of the child, and of the potential dad instead of yourself. You never know how this other man may react, he might want to be an active father in the child's life and I believe he has that right and choice.
Do you kn... (read in full...)
A song keeps reminding me of how grumpy I behaved one night, short before my relationship broke down. How can I stop blaming myself?
Q. A couple of years ago I was in a serious relationship lasting two years. This was my first ever relationship. A few months before our relationship finished, we went on holiday. On the last night of the holiday, we went dancing (something I hated ...
A. 18 September 2008: Hey man, I feel for you but what happened to you happens to everyone at some point in their life and it is something you will learn from. It is normal to sometimes over-blame yourself for something like you are doing now. Yeah maybe you should have ... (read in full...)
My boyfriend likes to tease me a lot, sometimes rudely. Or am I a nit pick?
Q. My boyfriend likes to tease me a lot. I understand sometimes it is funny but sometimes it really gets to me. For example, when I got home last night we were about to go to bed and he said I bet in your dream home you want a huge closet, I said yes ...
A. 17 September 2008: Hey,
Sometimes someone in a relationship can end up being careless and saying things which hurt the other person, usually this is a stage in maturing in a relationship and learning what is and what isn't appropriate. What he is doing might be... (read in full...)
What should I do now to stop being pregnant??
Q. Last night i had sex usig condom but unfourtunatley it broke and becose i was scared i took a pill of microgynon which i had stopped for a while, what shall i do now? Is it possible that this piss to not have an efect from the first day? What you...
A. 16 September 2008: Yes, agreed. All you need to do is go in to the chemist and ask for the "morning after pill". You may not even have to pay for it.
Have a look at this URL for more information:
http://www.ne... (read in full...)
How do I break away from a married man after five years?
Q. I have dated a married man for five years now and i would like to get over him very much. we have not benn intimate for 9 months now but i feel like i am going to go backwards pleas give me advice on how to get over him....
A. 20 August 2008: Hey, it sounds like you have made a really strong effort to move on from this guy so well done for that.
Have you considered talking to a therapist about why you are drawn to him so strongly? Perhaps if you are able to talk about it with som... (read in full...)
How long will it take until he trusts me again and is there anything I can do to help the situation?
Q. I cheated on my bf and then told him about it a week later. We're still together and trying to work things through and for the most part we're better than ever. However he has to be with me everywhere I go, and if he's not there I have to ring him ...
A. 20 August 2008: Try not to beat yourself up over this, and don't let him make you feel worse than you already are. We all make mistakes, and it is about learning from them, rather than keep going round in circles about the past. Allow him to have his say, to tell ... (read in full...)
Is it a smart decision to move to another country to get over a heartbreak?
Q. is it a smart move to leave the country to move on from heartbreak and just start life with another country? and is it okay to still make friends to him afterall the lies he had caused me?please advice me...
A. 20 August 2008: In my experience, from mostly watching how other people run away from their problems, I would say no. Your thoughts will always catch up with you, no matter how far away you move. The only way to get over a heartbreak is with time and eventual ... (read in full...)
He sometimes rubs my stomach, but I don't really like him lifting my shirt up.
Q. Hi I have been with my boyfriend for about 5 months however, i am very self-conscious of my body, mostly my stomach. im not exactly fat but i do have red stretch marks on my stomach. he sometimes rubs my stomach but i dnt really like him lifting...
A. 19 August 2008:
The way you feel is typical of many people around your age, so do not feel like there is anything wrong with you, because there isn't.
Body confidence comes with time and experience. Over time you become more familiar and accepting of how you l... (read in full...)
I don't want him to judge me, if I tell him the truth. I love him so much.
Q. Dear Cupid I was date-raped three years ago. All I remember about the incident is him saying he's clean and I should not worry about diseases, but I should get the morning after pill. Anyway, I fell pregnant, but aborted and went for every test ...
A. 19 August 2008: Wow. Good reply from Yos. I agree with what he says about deciding whether or not to tell the boyfriend and that any issue that he may take up will more likely to do with the rape, rather than the abortion. You have had three years to come to terms ... (read in full...)
I love my boyfriend, but he does not want to work, or go to school, he plays xbox 360 all day long, I am 18, he is 20, what can I say to motivate him to do something with his life?
Q. well im 18 and i have a bf thats 20.I love him alot but the thing is that he doesnt work and doesnt wanna go to school or like basically do anything..All he does is play on xbox 360 the whole day.. 1.How should I tell him to do something with h...
A. 8 August 2008: He's only 20, if he wants to play on his xbox and not go to school then that is up to him really.
It's the best time to do it, before he has commitments like children, marriage, career. I never really started working hard in life until I was 26. ... (read in full...)
How do I move on from this relationship but remain friends with her?
Q. My girlfriend has recently broken up with me and no i do not want to get back with her, but i do want to remain friends but i dont know what steps to take to make that happen because now she happens to be dating my best friend and every time i see ...
A. 8 August 2008: Take one day at a time. It sounds like you need to deal with the breakup and also that she is now with your best mate before you attempt to still be friends with either of them.
Right now you are probably slightly in denial about it all. You say ... (read in full...)
My girlfriend enjoys oral sex, but her pubic hair is a turnoff for me, I've talked to her about it, but so far it is still the same, what do I do now?
Q. My girl says she really enjoys guys giving her oral sex. I really want to but im put off by her pubes. I don't want her pubes in my mouth. I've talked to her about it and she says she might get it waxed but that was months ago and still the bush ...
A. 8 August 2008: If you don't like it then don't give her oral again until the bush is gone or noticibly reduced.... (read in full...)
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